Well, as you've no doubt noticed, I stopped journalling on here - or indeed anywhere else - a long time ago.

I feel like a creative update is in order though, because my submissions have been running pretty dry too, which shouldn't really be happening since I'm doing a creative degree (Graphic Design).
It has not been a smooth path though... foundation year just totally clicked with me, I was working prolifically, and barely even noticing I was doing it, because it was all coming so naturally.
I was getting distinctions left right and centre, and generally having the time of my life. I got onto my dream course here in Brighton, and things really couldn't have been better...

But somehow now, at the end of that first year of this course, I'm looking back over it and realising... I've never really got into the swing of things this year. Working has stopped coming easily to me, and producing worksheets and idea generation has become a real strain.
I think this is a combination of myself and the course.
I've struggled to come to terms with the difficult and sometimes confusing requirements of this course. Sketchbooks are actively discouraged, and as a result, one of my most prolific outlets has totally dried up... it's difficult to produce them knowing that all they'll ever be are books in a drawer, seen by no one but me.

And - although I'm probably exaggerating - it often feels like creativity is actively discouraged at the expense of technical perfection.
Technical perfection is something I really struggle with. I'm a massive perfectionist in my private life and my living habits, but when it comes to my work, I can be downright sloppy - and previously it's always been to my advantage, but suddenly when we're expected to spend weeks straight hand rendering typography to look exactly like it does on the computer screen... I really find myself losing the will to carry on.

My worksheets have gone downhill - my collaging, texture, sampling of external materials... all discouraged. And without those things, well, there's little left, because they were what made my work a success.

And as for final pieces... Well, they've gone the same way.
I'm still widely regarded as one of the more prolific people on the course, but I'm producing far far less than I was on foundation, and of a much lower quality.

There have been a few projects where I've been able to assert myself and what I believe in, and I've produced some work I'm really proud of... and I've made a point of throwing in a little bit of floral or masking tape wherever I could...

But then came my final assessment. I've been plodding along all year getting mainly C's, and a couple of B's, which I'm happy with. I've probably done about the same on my final assessment.
But this doesn't matter. What does matter is the complete and utter slating I got from the two tutors. There was not a positive remark made in the whole half hour I spent with them (Well, with the exception of 'you're obviously enthusiastic'. They sorted through my work, pulling out all my typography work, and proceeding to metaphorically rip it to pieces. I knew it was weak, but they repeated it so many times I was almost bought to tears.

They also dissed my floral folders.
This was what bothered me the most.

I left the room feeling absolutely battered and bruised (metaphorically ), and utterly despondent about the whole course... almost to the point of jacking the whole thing in and running away to work in Sainsburys.
But anyway, I've pulled myself together, and realised things need to get better. I need to get my creative groove back, no matter how dry and technical this damn course is going to be, I am not going to waste my parents money sending me here by dropping out at the first signs of trouble.

Gloom and doom is over, productivity is back! I hope, anyway...

As for the other aspects of my life, all is well. I've made some good friends down here, eventually, and am really optimistic about next year, the social outlook is good And my friends back home remain the amazing people they always have been, and I'm so so pleased that everyone is still in contact and such a frequent basis. Special big ups to *celtes, ~Dirtymagic, ~Sir-Alan-Sugar and various other non deviants for their support when I'm been whining and moaning about stupid things like my noisy flatmates or my stomach ache.
I've got my flat sorted for next year, me and Martin are moving in together. It's a small but well formed one bedroom split level flat, about a minute from the sea front, a minute from the main shopping street, and 15 minutes walk from uni . I'm utterly in love with it, and cannot wait to move in.

It was me and Martin's one year anniversary yesterday, and it's been an amazing year... I feel ridiculously lucky to have met him, and I'm really looking forwards to the future, in all aspects of my life...

Even in the creative areas.
Look forwards to some submissions soon, hopefully.......